In a way, Hiei is tempted to reiterate what he's said before. He hadn't even been looking for a relationship with Kurama - what made him think he would be looking for something with someone else after him? But repeating himself did not change the point, nor would it change anything about what had happened, now. They could not go back in time and change how things had happened between them, and yet knowing as much did not stop Hiei from seething about it all. There had been many years that he could have utilized to move on, of course, and yet it still found him here, frowning as Kurama speaks, but very carefully not interrupting what the redhead had to say.
Kurama's uneasy body language, looking at him and then away, says enough. He is uncomfortable with the conversation, and even though it shouldn't, Hiei is ever so slightly enjoying watching the fox squirm a bit. He had spent long enough twisted up and unsure of what the hell to do about any of it on his own, to have it be Kurama's turn was more than enough for him.
Silence stretches between them as Kurama finishes, Hiei both allowing his partner time to speak again if he wants to as much as simply rolling it over in his mind, thinking about how he wants to reply.
"I don't know in what capacity I want you around, yet." Yes, even now he can feel the tug of war between his head and his heart, the attention and affection he wants versus his mind's reminders of what happened when he allowed the fox in before. Learning to trust him in the first place, beyond in a fight, had been a struggle.
"I don't know that I can trust you in the same way as before, now."
no subject
In a way, Hiei is tempted to reiterate what he's said before. He hadn't even been looking for a relationship with Kurama - what made him think he would be looking for something with someone else after him? But repeating himself did not change the point, nor would it change anything about what had happened, now. They could not go back in time and change how things had happened between them, and yet knowing as much did not stop Hiei from seething about it all. There had been many years that he could have utilized to move on, of course, and yet it still found him here, frowning as Kurama speaks, but very carefully not interrupting what the redhead had to say.
Kurama's uneasy body language, looking at him and then away, says enough. He is uncomfortable with the conversation, and even though it shouldn't, Hiei is ever so slightly enjoying watching the fox squirm a bit. He had spent long enough twisted up and unsure of what the hell to do about any of it on his own, to have it be Kurama's turn was more than enough for him.
Silence stretches between them as Kurama finishes, Hiei both allowing his partner time to speak again if he wants to as much as simply rolling it over in his mind, thinking about how he wants to reply.
"I don't know in what capacity I want you around, yet." Yes, even now he can feel the tug of war between his head and his heart, the attention and affection he wants versus his mind's reminders of what happened when he allowed the fox in before. Learning to trust him in the first place, beyond in a fight, had been a struggle.
"I don't know that I can trust you in the same way as before, now."